How Food and Weight Shaped My Childhood
My relationship with food was complicated for as long as I can remember. Growing up in an immigrant household, food was always around, always encouraged, and yet it was always the source of so much discomfort as well. Even my mom's earliest stories of food are about how fearful she was that I was underfed, and she would push me to overeat in order to meet some guidelines she read in a parenting book. The notion of "knowing when I am full" wasn't a concept for me until well into adulthood.
As a result, I grew up as a chubby kid who would always be encouraged to eat, while at the same time always hearing comments about my size. Couple this with the fact that I was quite the sensitive kid growing up, and that my parents had very little tools to deal with that, and food, especially sugary foods, became the go-to emotional support for myself.
Whenever emotions came up that I did not know how to handle, food was the reliable source of soothing that I would go to and ultimately would never be denied. Even now, as I look back on pictures, I can know exactly what I was feeling in the times those pictures were taken, because if I was heavier I know I was going through something, and when the circumstances changed I would lose weight again.
In addition to this, I was a kid who got into martial arts relatively early and stayed very active in it for a long time. By all standards I was "fit," but my body image was always that of the overweight kid. Looking back at pictures, I can now see a totally healthy weight for myself, yet I always felt fat. This affected the clothes I wore, dating, and how critical I was of myself, and overall I never got over the emotional eating that was central to my relationship with food. That yo-yo relationship would follow me all throughout school and early life, where I would gain a lot of weight whenever something difficult occurred, lose it, and flip-flop back and forth.
Why I Joined Step Together
My own weight loss journey and passion for the work eventually got me to open up my own brick-and-mortar weight loss center, which I ran for 10 years. While primarily working with adults who suffered with chronic weight loss issues, I saw first hand how these issues can compound over decades when unaddressed early.
When I ran my studio, I didn't have the emotional tools and frameworks that are so central to the Step Together program, and I wish I had, as emotions and the relationship with food are such a critical component to the overall success of this journey.
So when I saw Step Together, I realized this was the solution that could solve so many of the issues I had faced both personally and professionally. By focusing on the child, it proactively removes decades of suffering. It sets up the family and child for habits that can compound over time in a positive direction, and most importantly, it has the foundations in place to truly address the issues at the core, helping the child and family improve their relationship first with all the pillars that matter: nutrition, lifestyle, emotions, tech hygiene, and ultimately identity.
In short, it's the program and tools I wish I had, both when I was a child and when I ran my own studio.
How I'm Uniquely Positioned to Help
In addition to being able to relate deeply with the children and families going through this because of my own journey, I also have extensive education and "in the trenches" experience of working with people in these areas. Since closing my studio down (which also had a strong emotional component to it), I've learned so much about the interplay of how our reality, behaviors, and identity are shaped by our relationship to our emotions, and I'm happy to be able to use all of this to improve the lives of other families.
What I Want Every Parent to Hear
While what is in front of you may feel quite heavy and difficult, I cannot stress enough what a blessing it is for you to be looking at solutions to handle this now, while your kid is still a kid.
Habits are always way easier to learn than they are to unlearn, and just you being here, considering this program, puts you in a position to truly set your kid up for a lifetime of less suffering. Even if it feels hard, this is actually the easiest time to make these changes, before decades of baggage end up attached to the situation.
I want to honor your presence, forethought, and commitment to helping your child address this sooner rather than later. It is truly something I wish was available and in my parents' periphery when I was a child.
